Happy Fathers' Day

Later today I'll be heading out to the small town (village?) where my parents live. When I say small, I mean a population of less than a thousand people kind of small. Yeah. I love my Dad. He has turned out to be a wonderful, supportive and loving father throughout the years. Although, it hasn't always been that way. As was the custom at the time, my parents married quite young. In 1968 they were 21 going on 22. At that time, where they lived, all their peers and family members got married by that age, if not younger. They went on, as their peers also did, to start their family immediately. Thus, I came along just less than a year after they were married, in the spring of '69 and my brother a year and a half later in the fall of 1970 and five years after that, my sister arrived in 1975. I think in many ways my brother, sister and I grew up with our parents, since they has us so young. I think my Dad often felt like he got roped into the whole marriage and family thing and felt trapped through the years. His frustration often led to cruelty on his part, and you can bet that we (especially my brother and I, although he softened a bit by the time my little sister came around) were never spared the rod. Or the boot, or the flyswatter, or whatever happened to be handy at the time. There were no "timeouts" or "grounding". Sometimes we were sent to our rooms, after we had been spanked, but not always. It was never a consistent thing. You just never knew what you were going to get, but you sure ran like hell when you knew you were getting it! Things improved bit by bit, year by year. As we grew and matured together. My mother was definitely the backbone of our family unit, but my Dad always worked very hard to provide for us. For about 7 years, he both farmed our small farm and went to work everyday at a construction job which was an hour's drive each way. He worked long hours and could never, ever be accused of being lazy. I have many fond memories of times with my Dad. He taught me how to tie my shoes, how to ride a bike. On the rare occasions that he took me to swimming lessons instead of my Mom he would comb through my wet hair afterwards very gently, not ripping the comb through like my Mom was prone to do. I remember sitting on the verandah with him when a thunderstorm came by our neighbourhood and seeing the lightning hit a tree nearby. He held me and comforted me and reassured me that the lightning could not burn down our house because we had lightning rods on the roof. :) It was a very comforting thing for an eight year old to hear. My Dad made me feel safe from the outside threats of the world. My Dad seemed to make a huge adjustment after I moved out on my own. When I was in highschool we often butted heads and I think he enjoyed some peace when I was gone. After that, he always loved my visits, encouraging me to visit often (with or without boyfriends) and we got along much better after that. My sister also remarked on his shift in attitude at that time in his life as well, saying that he was just far more pleasant to be around. However, she believes it also had much to do with the fact that his employment became more stable around that time period (in prior years he was often laid off from his construction jobs due to lack of work in the area) and things improved for him financially, which also took a lot of strain and stress off of him. For many years my father has wished to be a grandfather. He has been a kind of "surrogate" grandfather to his brother's grandkids who also live in the same village as my parents, but a year and a half ago he finally got his wish, when my sister had her first child. Now my niece is the "adored one". :) She is a beautiful angel who has entered our lives and we are all enthralled with her. My parents are the most doting grandparents you could ever imagine. My Dad just loves spending time with his granddaughter. She is the light of his life! It is truly a beautiful thing to behold the bond between them. She adores him right back. Although, not quite as much as she adores grandma, which irks him just a bit! lol! And they recently got the news that they are to be blessed a with a second grandchild. They are beside themselves with happiness! I think that my Dad has had time to reflect about the difference between himself as a parent and a grandparent and he knows that in the early days he came up short, but he has made up for it by leaps and bounds and I would not want anyone else in the world to be my Dad! I love you Dad! Happy Father's Day!